uuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuck

8 Nov

Stuff that I am grateful for after having spilled scalding hot soup on my crotch:

I didn’t spill soup on my laptop

I was alone (and not in a crowded restaurant) so it wasn’t totally humiliating when I ripped my pants off

I know how I’ll react in times of crisis- cool as a cucumber

I am staying with a friend with an aloe vera plant right beside where I was sitting after I spilled soup on my crotch

My reproductive organs are sensibly tucked away and mainly internal

And that’s about it. Me and my crotch are just going to writhe the rest of this day away. Cheers!!

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